So you all remember non-lesbian, A, right? Well if you don’t she is a girl I’ve been on a couple of “dates” with now, who talks about lesbians things, but is NOT a lesbian (her words). Full story is here and here.
Some Thursdays we decide to hang out after she has class. We agreed to hang out this past Thursday. So I was chilling out in an blue A-shirt and baggy pajama pants watching a silly horror German flick, when I hear the doorbell. Now I tend to be formal in appearance which means I never wear sweatpants to class and I don’t let new friends see me in pajamas. I'm explaining this so you know how comfortable I was to begin with when I opened the door and there was A, without having called first. What could I do except invite her in? I apologize for my attire and she comments “The black looks good on you”. Now I think she’s talking about my A-shirt, so I point out my shirt is more blue than black. She points out she was talking about my hair and not my A-shirt. I had recently dyed my hair and I had forgotten she hadn’t seen the outcome yet. Usually I’m not so dim-witted, I swear. So I laugh off the misunderstanding and then we sit and start chatting.
Anyways flash forward to the pub we frequent. She starts talking about the past weekend she had with our mutual gay guy friends. She tells me she got drunk and then kissed a girl and then kissed a boy…and WAIT WHAT? I was so stunned that I only half heard a comment about how the girl in question managed to “turn” her. She said this all very quickly and unceremoniously before she proceeded to mention the guy she kissed. I was too flabbergasted to bring the topic up again. Okay I haven’t even kissed a girl and here is non-lesbian, a conservative Baptist preacher kid, telling me she kissed a girl. I know, I know, lots of straight girls kiss other girls for a variety of reasons, but I guess I never expected A to be someone like that.
As this is how the night gets started, my mind decides to go and drop general hints about sexuality, by talking about LGBT business in the church and such. But each time I mention anything gay related except about our mutual gay friends, she gets quiet and a tiny bit cold.
At one point during the night A is talking about flirting and how she’s so bad at it, and why can’t the person she’s attempting to flirt with just ask her out already? Now if I was a male thing I would not be able to ignore this anvil sized hint, but I’m not, so complications. If A is interested I’m not going to be the aggressor particularly when whenever I mention gay things she withdraws.
She’s a feminist, into strong women (at least intellectually), but can’t help but mention how cute the waiter is every time he passes by. Once when the waiter passed she grabbed him and said to me, “Honey what do you want?” Now I know “honey” is used by women in the South even to strangers, but is it a Midwest thing too? I don’t generally let my friends call me “honey”, “kid”, “etc.”
She drops me off at my apartment and I’m all confused. Still am. Though I had thought with all my LGBT talking I would have scared her away. But this past Sunday she came to see me play in the orchestra (in my tie) and then suggested we go grab lunch. Again just me, the invitation wasn’t extended to anyone else. Afterwards she offered to drive me to work, and I had to change clothes so I invited her into my apartment. Or well I was going to but my roommate answered the door with no pants on. She hurriedly closed the door and rushed inside. I apologized for my roommate and A said “Sometimes no-pants time can be fun”.
This woman drives me nuts sometimes. At this point it’s become a game. How much of my gay-ness can I reveal before she realizes I am actually gay. And ultimately is she or isn’t she?
QBP: "Some women can't say the word lesbian... even when their mouth is full of one." -Kate Clinton
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